How to Annoy Your Co-Workers

Joke ID#1239
Funny (3.08)
Rating (0.53)
CategoryAt Work  
Submitted ByNewf
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1) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

2) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. This is especially effective if your boss is a different gender than you.

3) Make up nicknames for all your co-workers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Chachie."

4) Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them exactly what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

5) Hi-Lite your shoes. Tell people you haven't lost them as often since you did this.

6) While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in Palmolive. Call everyone Madge.

7) Hang mosquito netting around your cubicle. When you emerge to get coffee, a printout, or whatever, slap yourself at random the whole way.

8) Put a chair facing a printer. Sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.

9) Every time someone asks you to do something, anything, ask him or her if they want fries with that.

10) Send e-mail back and forth to yourself, engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

11) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair-dancing.

12) Put your trash can on your desk. Label it "IN".

13) Feign an unnatural and hysterical fear of staplers.

14) Send e-mail messages saying there's free pizza, donuts, or cake in the lunchroom. When people drift back to work complaining that they found none, lean back, pat your stomach, and say, "Oh you've got to be faster than that."

15) Put decaf in the coffeemaker for three weeks. Once everyone has withdrawn from caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

Comments on this Joke
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Posted by Gizzer Jun 04, 2003

I might just try #12!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by hilo Jul 14, 2003

lol I'm a big fan of #9

Comment score: 0  

Posted by tissue Jun 16, 2004

#15 for me.

Comment score: 0  

Posted by jonesy Jan 27, 2005


Comment score: -1  

Posted by ntsoaky Jul 22, 2005

3 & 13 r 4 me!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by sniperkid990 Jul 23, 2005

14, 13, 10, 4, 3, 2 and 1 are sooooooooo like me

Comment score: 1  

Posted by ballerina2293 Jul 25, 2005

i didnt get 6&7. ther rest were really funny tho! sounds like something i would do!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by shimmermaid Aug 02, 2005

I like #1!

Comment score: -1  

Posted by WolfDaemon Sep 03, 2005

7 and 8 are definately some thing I'd do... but maybe 15'd be interesting

Comment score: -1  

Posted by mellew Dec 16, 2006

i like #9 && i can always keep a straight face when i tell a joke so itll b extremely funny

Comment score: 1  

Posted by Eins Jun 04, 2007

Too bad #15 can't work lol.

Comment score: 1  

Posted by Fathead Oct 09, 2012

This was on The Edge on the newspaper The Oregonian once. It was titled, "How to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity in the Workplace".

Comment score: 1  

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