The Best Blonde Jokes

Joke ID#11364
Funny (1.96)
Rating (2.2)
Submitted Byreptilegirl
Corrected By boodler
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Q: Why do blondes insist on guys wearing condoms?
A: So they'll have a doggie bag for later.

Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
A: "Are you sure it's mine?"

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a walrus?
A: One has whiskers and fishy flaps, the other is a walrus

Q: What does a blonde say after she graduates from college?
A: "Hi, welcome to McDonalds."

Q: What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
A: Last year's hide and seek champ.

Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A: A space invader.

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!

Q: How do blonde brain cells die?
A: Alone.

Q: Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children?
A: Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.

Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: Pregnant.

Q: What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.

Q: Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them.

Q How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?
A: There's Tippex on the screen.

Q: How can you tell if another blonde's been using the same computer?
A: There's writing on the Tippex.

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes sparkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Q. Did you hear about the blond man who had 8 vasectomies?
A. He had to -- his wife kept getting pregnant!

Q: What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A: A blow job with handle bars.

Comments on this Joke
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Posted by undercover_joker May 03, 2006

i heard all of these before except for the hide and seek one which was hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment score: 2  

Posted by butterflyheaven May 27, 2006

Im a blond and normally find blond jokes funny, but these were just cruel. These go way beyond just having a laugh.

Comment score: 1  

Posted by Elementsk8r Jun 07, 2006

You said it was rated G!!!It should be rated R b/c of your first joke on tht page!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by Jeni_Music_Girl Jun 23, 2006

i'm a blond (and you can tell) and i thought they were super funny!

Comment score: -1  

Posted by piano_player Oct 09, 2007

hey, Elementsk8tr i think it actually says pg13 but i agree anyway

Comment score: 2  

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